January 17, 1992
Dear Everyone:
About a week ago, “Freddy Johnson”, the CEO of
Company, announced that he had an announcement to make.
To everyone.
At the same time.
All 50,000+ employees.
It took the people in charge no more than a week to
get this lined up. They rented
the Masonic Auditorium in San Francisco, although how they got it at
such short notice, I don't know. Must've
been the Old Boy Network. They
also rented Tour Buses to shuttle people from the Financial District to
the Auditorium, which is at the top of Nob Hill.
As an additional inducement, they provided a free
Continental Breakfast before the Big Show. And this was just in San
Francisco. In “Hobby”, they took
over part of the Four Seasons Hotel. In
all, they had video links via satellite to 16 locations and audio links
in 43 others as far away as Calgary and London.
The whole thing was being done out from Company
Park in “Pleasanton”, which has its own microwave communications tower
(which they decorate with strings of colored lights at Christmas-time). Then,
they had dedicated phone lines from all the receiving locations
back to “Pleasanton”, so
people could call in questions after the Big Announcement.
(We saw the banks of operators
waiting to take calls during the warm-up before “Freddie” came on.
Somebody said it look like pledge
night on PBS.)
Needless to say, as soon as they announced all of
this, the rumor mill started churning out speculations at an
ever-increasing rate. &n By last
Friday, it had hit
Warp 8.
We’re being taken over by the Japanese:p>
We’re being taken over by Pennzoil. (Pennzoil bought just under 10%
of Company's stock last year. If
they try to get anymore, they run into something called a Poison Pill,
which sounds unpleasant anyway you go with it.)
They're going to fire everyone over 40.
They're going to cut the work-force by 10%.
An antique dealer (?) told “Carla's” brother that
Company was going to cut 10,000 people off at the knees.
They're going to move all the Bay Area people (+/-
13,600) to (shudder) Texas. (I've
been hearing this one since the first week I started work at what was
then Standard XXX of California in 1973.)
And, on a rather grisly/humorous note: &nbs “Freddie's” going to announced
that he has AIDS and it could happen to anyone, ala
Magic Johnson.
Finally, at 9:00 this last Wednesday, “Freddie”
came on camera with his Big Announcement: n style="mso-spacerun:yes">
Profits are down. There's
a recession on. (Translation:
We aren't raking in the bucks big
enough and fast enough.)
This is news? They
think we don't know this? Don't
these guys watch CNN?
“Freddie” had nice charts and graphs to show how
much money Company wasn't making compared to how much it made in 1990. Etc., etc., etc.
He showed us statistics on how
other companies had used Quality Improvement (buzzword of the ‘90’s:
Quality)
to increase efficiency and eliminate jobs (and workers).
He told us that Company Corp. has a
new-and-improved Mission Statement. Pick
up a copy on your way out. Just
what we need. Another Mission
Statement.
Then he got to the Big Payoff: They want to cut 2500 jobs.
(Is that
all?)
They're offering a retirement package to people who
qualify (and I don't qualify, so don't worry) to retire early, thus
opening up spaces for people who haven't been "surplussed” due to
reorganizations. And, oh by the
way, they're freezing salaries for a minimum of three months.
And they may, or may not, decide
to shut down the “Beaumont” Refinery, which doesn't directly affect
people who don't work there; but I can foresee trying to get all the
records squared away. It's not a
pretty picture.
2400 people showed up at the Masonic Auditorium,
considerably more than the coffee-and-muffin people had anticipated. In all, they figured that 26,000
employees saw and/or heard the words straight from “Freddie's” mouth on
the first pass. They video taped
the whole thing and ran an instant replay that afternoon for people who
couldn't make the first showing. Technically
speaking, it went off without a hitch. Somebody's
going to get a nice, big R&A (Recognition & Award) for this one.
One of the called-in questions at the end was,
"This was good. Why not do it
again in six months?"
“Freddie” said he'd think about it.
In all, everything's OK. I'm not eligible for early
retirement, so I don't have to worry about that.
I may not get the salary increase
that I earned in 1991 until 1993, but I've still got a job and that's
more than a lot of people can say these days.
And it's Friday.
Love, as always,
Pete
PS. How much did “Freddie's” dog and pony show
cost? Don't ask.
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