February 22, 1991
Dear Everyone:
Well, I have done my civic duty.
Last weekend, according to the written instructions that came
with the Jury Summons, I called the phone number they gave me and got
the following recording:
“You have reached the Jury Commissioner’s Office.
If you were instructed to call this number and your panel number
is One, Two, Three, or Eleven (eleven?!
They have eleven courtrooms now?
“Jeannie” says yes, they’ve taken over some administrative offices and
turned them into small—and crowded, I’ll bet—courtrooms) please report
to the courthouse before 9:00 am on Tuesday, February 19.
If your panel number is Four, Five or Six, please call this
number between the hours of 11:30 am and 12:30 pm on Tuesday, February
19, for a possible afternoon appearance at 1:00 pm.”
This is a new gimmick.
It used to be that they would call everyone in at 9:00 and then
just keep them hanging around the courthouse until mid-afternoon in case
they were needed. This way,
people can stay in touch without taking up valuable parking spaces near
the courthouse.
They’re real specific about dates and times and
speak very slowly and distinctly.
A pleasant change from the usual phone message “Yeah, this is Joe
Alb*&^%$. I need to talk to
you about tea scaping overfitz as soon as possible.
My number is 894-2-click!”
My panel number was Five, which meant that I had to
call at 11:30 to find out if they wanted me at the Martinez courthouse
by 1:00. Now here’s the
problem: If I went into the
office in San Francisco Tuesday morning and called at 11:30.
And if the message said be at the courthouse by 1:00, I wouldn’t
be able to make it in time what with getting across the bay (BART only
runs every 15 minutes at that time of day) and driving from Pleasant
Hill to Martinez to finding a parking space (major problem in that part
of Martinez), not to mention not having time to get some lunch, a matter
of significant importance to me since it’s usually the only solid food I
get all day.
I decided that this was God’s way of telling me to
relax and sleep in on Tuesday.
Which I did.
Promptly at 11:30 Tuesday morning, I called the
Jury Commissioner’s Office.
And got a busy signal. And
called again. And got
another busy signal.
Stands to reason.
About 150 people were probably all calling at the same time.
When I finally did get through, I got a new message:
If your panel number is Four, be at the courthouse at 1:30.
Panels Five and Six, call again tomorrow between 11:30 and 12:30.
I began to suspect a pattern was developing.
What if I called on Wednesday and got the same message?
Call again tomorrow.
One day of quasi-legal playing hooky from work I could handle, but a
whole week? Even two or
three days?
I tried to think of some work that “Rowena” could
bring home for me that I could do at least in the morning until the
11:30 call. The problem was,
I’d deliberately worked to tie up as many loose ends as I could before
this week. To start anything
now would virtually guarantee I’d be called in to the courthouse the
next afternoon.
I finally salved my guilty conscience by going into
the office Wednesday morning.
Once there, I found a few things that I needed to do that I could
work on at home, like studying DrawPerfect.
So I lugged some books and things home, called the courthouse and
got “If your panel is Four, Five or Six, you will be happy t hear that
your service is complete.
You do not need to call or report to this office any more.
Thank you for your service.”
I said:
“You’re welcome! Hey!
Let’s do it again real soon”
And thank you MacKenzie, Brackman, Chaney, Kuzak
and Becker [L.A. Law]
for settling all those cases before lunch.
I took this as God’s way of telling me to go
shopping at Costco, where the crowds are significantly smaller on
Thursday than they are on the weekends.
I spent $230.75, but hey!
I won’t need to buy sweetener for my tea again until next Labor
Day. And as for plain, white
envelopes, not until Labor Day of 1992.
That jug of grapefruit juice has to be used up by June 8th
of this year, but I like grapefruit juice.
At least I do now. I
don’t know how I’ll feel about it by June 8th.
Also, I threw a bone to my guilt complex by buying
some things to use in the office and not putting in for a reimbursement.
Love, as always,
Pete
| Previous | Next |