October 23, 2015
Dear Everyone:
Welcome to Adventures in
Dentistry!
When we last checked in on our Plucky Heroine, she had just detected a
Dental Emergency shortly before jetting off to the
ARMA International
Conference in Washington, D.C.
She consulted her Trusty Dentist who took one look at an x-ray
and pronounced: “Looks like
an abscess tooth!” And sent
her off to visit the Kindly
Endodontist.
The Kindly Endodontist took one look at the x-ray and pronounced:
“I recommend a
Root Canal.
Let’s do it right now, shall we?”
(Gulp! Nothing like
an emergency root canal at the drop of a hat, is there?)
While in Washington, D.C., our plucky Heroine took special care to only
chew on the right side, the recently drilled-through bridge being on the
left side. (Right side!
Right side!) In the
meantime, she had a regularly scheduled semi-annual checkup right after
returning from the Conference.
And her Trusty Dentist’s office had already called to schedule a
follow-up on the root canal for a procedure to, essentially, seal and
“pave over” the hole in the bridge created by the Kindly Endodontist.
During the regularly scheduled checkup, the Trusty Dentist detected a
problem with a crown on a lower right molar.
Why not fix that and the follow-up on the root canal all together
the very next day? (Gulp!)
Two dental procedures in one sitting—and we use the term “sitting”
loosely. Chairs in dental
offices no longer tilt back.
They turn all the way upside down.
The chair goes up and the patient goes down.
The better to drill through your teeth, my dear.
It always reminds me of the
upside down crucifixion of Saint
Peter.
The Trusty Dentist also has a new piece of equipment.
It fits inside the patient’s mouth, holds the jaw open, and
includes a suction device to suck up all the water, etc., before the
patient drowns. There’s only
one problem:
It seems like it’s roughly the size and shape of
Levi's Stadium.
It’s a little big for our Plucky Heroine’s dainty little mouth.
It also shoves the patient’s tongue back into her throat, thus
triggering an excellent
gag reflex.
Oops! (OK.
Maybe that’s more than one problem.
But you get the picture.)
Nevertheless, after only one interminable upside-down hour, the root
canal had been paved over and a very temporary (and notoriously fragile)
“crown” was in place. Now
our Plucky Heroine is taking special care to only chew on the left side.
(Left side! Left
side! Wait-a-minute, which
side?) Our Plucky Heroine is
looking forward to a time when she can just eat without having to
consult a dental chart to be sure of using the correct side of her
mouth.
Have you hugged your dentist lately?
Love, as always,
Pete
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