May 19, 2005
Dear Everyone:
When I bought my townhouse in 1997, it was at the beginning of November. So it wasn’t until the following summer that I realized how warm the house could get during the day. I decided that it would be a good idea to find a way to shade the patio, which faces west and gets the summer sun all afternoon long.
I measured the patio. From the outside wall of the townhouse to the outer fence, which is owned by the Association: Ten feet. From the inner fence, co-owned by my next door neighbor and me, to the door to the storage shed: 18 feet.
Eventually, I stumbled upon an “EZ-UP Instant Shade”. This consisted of a metal frame and a cloth cover. If you’ve been to any kind of street fair lately, you’ve probably seen a version of this kind of shade. It unfolds “quickly and easily” and provides a pretty good spot of shade. At the end of the day, it collapses and fits relatively well into a car trunk or truck. The one I found was ten feet across at the base.
“Jeannie” came down to help me get it set up. Needless to say, it didn’t take “two minutes” for us to get it put together. More like two hours on the hottest day of the year. Nevertheless, once it was up, it created a very nice block of shade between the side of the house and the sun.
And it lasted a couple of years before the original cloth cover split asunder during some storm. Eventually, I replaced the cover with a new, home-fashioned one. And another. And another. Until last winter when a storm hit while I was out of town and took out not only the cover, but the frame as well. So I’ve been on the lookout for another one. I have visited the company’s website and the cheapest one they offered was in the upper $400 range.
A few weeks ago, I found a place in
Last weekend, “Jeannie” again came down to help me put the “Instant Shade” up. We followed the instructions, which were clearly written with a couple of six-foot-tall men in mind. We quickly determined that getting the folding parts to unfold was not going to happen without the help of some WD-40 and a couple pairs of pliers.
After spraying and loosening ALL of the nut-and-bolt connectors, we were finally able to pull the major part of the frame all the way out. Then “Jeannie” began pushing the center supports into place. That’s when I realized that the two opposite sides of the frame were pushing against the side of the house on one side and the outer fence on the other. And that the side between them was bowing outward in an alarming manner.
“Holy crap!” I thought. “It’s going to break the fence!” That would be the part of the fence that belongs to the Association. Either that or it would break my kitchen window.
That’s when we realized that when the box said “10 feet square”, it must mean at the top, not at the bottom. At the bottom was more like 12 feet. It was clearly too big for my patio. We quickly collapsed the frame back into it’s original size and shape and reassessed the situation.
I need a smaller size shade. I’ll go get one this weekend. As for the “Sierra” model: Well, I kind of ripped the box to shreds getting the frame, etc. out. Plus we’d pretty much drowned the thing in WD-40. Couldn’t exactly drag it back to the store for a refund.
Not to worry, I have a friend at work who has a large back yard and will give the not-so-“EZ-UP” a good home. As she’s getting married next month, I told her to consider it a bridal shower gift. (I’d already gotten her a wedding gift.)
As for needing to shade my patio, we’ve had the
wettest spring in decades.
“Jeannie’s” off to
Love, as always,
Pete
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