September 11, 2003
Dear Everyone:
It came in the mail today. My absentee ballot for the California SillyCall. (I’ve used absentee ballots a number of times in the past, so they sent me a form to sign and mail back if I wanted to always get absentee ballots. So I did.)
Some of you who live outside of (and maybe a few
who live in)
Jesse Ventura
ran successfully to become governor of
But not in
Many years ago, there was a big fuss about some day care schools that may have been mistreating their students. Allegations were flung in all directions, including charges of witchcraft and Satanism. All came to naught, of course, but not before some businesses, and some individuals, were ruined by innuendo. Then one day I came out of the grocery store to see a woman seated behind her folding table. She was soliciting signatures on a petition to make Satanism illegal, just on general principle.
Never mind that outlawing a religion, any religion whether you like it or not, was completely unconstitutional. She was exercising her right to be ridiculous. So it’s not too surprising that someone got a few folding tables together and started a petition to recall the governor. Under normal circumstances it wouldn’t have gotten much farther than outlawing Satanism.
But then a wealthy businessman saw his opportunity to buy the governorship without having to go through the usual process of primaries and general elections and having to deal with any real politicians. So he hired hundreds of “volunteers” (who were more than happy to have a job, any job) to go out and collect signatures. Before you could say “comedians’ paradise” the petition was up and running.
Whereupon the Republican Party, suddenly realizing that they might win the election they lost on the last try, hijacked the petition and tossed the businessman aside. And then everybody jumped on the bandwagon and the absentee ballot is 15½” long, 8½” wide and printed on both sides.
Some of the names are well-known:
Arnold Schwarzenegger (usually referred to in headlines as “Actor”
because his name is too long),
Larry Flynt
(“publisher” i.e., pornographer),
Gary Coleman
(“actor”, read former child star),
Arianna
Huffington (who tried her own hand at buying a political office for
her husband). But to find
the name you (might) want, you have to plow through a lot of other
names, deliberately put in random order.
I like “Angelyne (no last name, “entertainer”).
I also like Nathan Whitecloud Walton (“student”).
And
Can we all sing a chorus of “Send in the Clowns”?
So what’s my opinion?
Is Gray Davis a good governor?
No, Tom McCall
was a good governor (of
On the other hand, how much “real” damage can whichever clown gets elected (assuming more people vote “yes” than “no” on the first question on the ballot) do in that much time? Let’s assume for a moment that any one of them gets the most votes. What happens if the voters then decide that they don’t like the “new” governor?
Son of Recall?
Love, as always,
Pete
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